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Written by Jillian Holness
Self-care is a popular buzzword in the media. Beauty and lifestyle brands advertise products in the name of relaxation and self-care. Healthcare professionals talk about the importance of taking time out for oneself and practicing self-care. But, what does this term really mean? Is the key to a clear mind and less stress simply going to the spa or treating yourself to a few items off your Amazon wishlist?
Licensed Clinical Therapist and Founder of the Clarity Couch Counseling Services in Cleveland, Angela Banks believes that self-care is personal and everyone can have their own interpretation.
As a therapist, her definition of self-care is prioritizing yourself, communicating clearly, setting boundaries and taking care of yourself.
Banks says that many of her clients have struggled with setting boundaries and prioritizing themselves. “I work with high-performing Black women who oftentimes have too much on their plate,” Banks says.
Banks says that high-achieving Bank women are perceived as having it all together and labeled as ‘the strong friend’. Banks describes herself as ‘the strong friend’ specialist and uses different therapeutic strategies including talk therapy or Dialectical Behavior Therapy, emotional regulation, and somatic techniques to treat clients.
She also believes that it’s important for mental health providers to be culturally responsive. “It’s about being open to accepting a client for who they are,” Banks says.
Banks has worked in the mental health field for over a decade and during her time as a researcher and student, she noticed that the history of therapy techniques and treatments were conducted by white men and the unique challenges Black people, especially Black women experience were not taken into account. Advances and the stigma against mental health care still have a long way to go, but Banks says self-care can be an effective form of treatment depending on the situation.
“People should take a moment to really see what makes them feel better,” Banks says. She also mentions that there are misconceptions about self-care such as spending money you don’t have to get your hair and nails done. “Self-care is different for everybody,” Banks says. “Social media also plays a big role on how we see ourselves.”
Banks advises others to find a balance with incorporating self-care into their lives while also seeing a mental health professional if needed. “It’s ok to ask for help,” Banks says. “Self-care is also individual and each person has their own definition.”